Tue 08/24/2010 4:59 PM

omg, a post... or 'what i did this summer'

I've been suffering some major blogging burnout these past few months, but I am forcing myself to write something today. It will either get me back into it, or confirm that I really don't want to do it anymore.

When you last heard from me, I was awaiting the long overdue arrival of our new couch. Long story short, it came, it was the wrong color. We put up a huge stink and finally found out that the color we had ordered was discontinued and this was the whole reason for the long delay. The factory was trying to special order it, and in the meantime they were supposed to have someone call us to let us know, and get a second choice selection from us in case they couldn't get it. For whatever reason, they didn't do that. The store gave us $100 back and we were promised $200 more from the manufacturer, but we have yet to see it. Oh well. We got the color we would have probably chosen as a second choice anyway, and we'll live with it and likely never do business with that store or manufacturer again. I'll refrain from naming names publicly, to protect myself, but if anyone really wants to know you can ask me privately.

While it seems trivial in the wake of everything else that has gone on this summer, details of which I'll get to shortly, I have to follow up on my iPhone 4 and that case for my old iPhone that I was so excited about yet so sad I wouldn't be able to use it with the new phone. It turned out it did fit on the new phone... sort of. It definitely wasn't made to fit it, and eventually due to the improper fit, I cracked it and had to throw it away. But I was pleasantly surprised to find I was totally wrong in my assumption that a back-only cover for the iPhone 4 would be impossible. In fact, a great many of the cases that have been designed for this phone are just that. They don't go on and off as easily as the ones for curved-edge iPhones did, but the most important thing is that they keep the front surface of the phone perfectly smooth for easy cleaning and no dirt/grime left in the corners. My 4 is currently sporting a "Barely There" case by Case-Mate, in purple of course. As for the phone itself, I'm completely and totally in love with it!

In early July I took my annual week-long vacation from work. I turned 31... we saw some awesome fireworks with some awesome friends at India Point in Providence. We went to Boston, spent too much to park... saw some fishes at the aquarium and then ate some fishes at a nearby sushi restaurant. Walked, drank, got sunburned. Went to pub trivia the next night with some of those awesome friends. Some more awesome friends came over for dinner and brought me cute cheeseburger cupcakes and a gift card for music and apps for my new phone. My sunburn turned into sun poisoning. We met yet more awesome friends out for karaoke. Spent a lot of time relaxing on the new couch. All things which should have recharged my motivation at work, but for some reason this year it didn't.

The rest of July, while there were some highlights, brought an unusual amount of stress, and toward the end of the month I felt myself starting to get depressed, which is highly unusual for me in the summertime. Recognizing it, I worked hard to fight it. I focused on eating healthy and exercising. The exciting news that I will soon have a new niece or nephew genuinely helped. Chris and I attended an OK Go concert in Providence with Crystal and Eddie, and had a really great night.

And then, on August 7, the day after that concert, just as I was beginning to feel like everything was going to be okay... fate sucker-punched me in the gut. My ex-coworker and dear friend, Norm, went out for a ride on his Harley with a buddy of his, and was hit by a careless driver in an SUV who decided to turn from the wrong lane just as Norm was passing him.

He didn't survive.

I can't even begin to describe the shock, the devastation, the anger... It's left me completely broken. Yes, I'm doing my best to carry on and enjoy life while treasuring all of the fond memories I have of him. But there are days when I wonder if I'll ever not be faking, ever really be healed. And sometimes I just want to close my eyes and not wake up until then.

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Wed 06/16/2010 3:02 PM

bullets about furniture and iphones

It's been a while since I've blogged, and I still don't have the time nor the inspiration for a long post, but here are a few updates.

The couch. Yes, it has been eleven weeks since we ordered it, and we still don't have it. We'd been getting the runaround, but finally got the truth yesterday: the fabric we chose was temporarily out of stock. We've now been promised that it will be delivered to the store on July 2, and to us the same day if it arrives early enough (the next day if not). If this is not the case, then believe you me, heads will roll.
iPhone 4. Did you doubt for a second that I'd be getting it? Oh yes, I've suffered the 2G quite long enough. Got my new toy reserved for pickup at the Providence Place Apple Store next Thursday!
Irony. Irony is finally finding an iPhone case you truly, truly love, one which is made to fit the 2G and 3G/3GS and not the iPhone 4, just weeks before you part ways with that old model phone. It's a false back, made to look like it's the actual back of the phone, complete with shiny metallic Apple logo... and it's purple. It snaps on and off the back of the phone so incredibly easily that you'd never believe it doesn't fall off when you don't want it to - but it doesn't. It doesn't cover the face of the phone at all, making it so much easier to clean the screen without leaving grossness in the corners. It is the perfect case I have been searching for the past two years, and in a week I won't be able to use it anymore. And sadly, the flat edges of the iPhone 4 mean that a case like this will probably not be possible for the new model.

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Fri 05/14/2010 11:42 AM

new web project haunting my dreams

This blog has been quiet lately, because I've been spending all of my free time working on a new project. It's one of the new web sites I purchased the domains for early last year, but never really found the motivation to start seriously working on. And it's no wonder - this site is more complicated than anything I've ever done before, and the thought of trying to figure out how to do all the things I want to do with it gets overwhelming at times. I'm having a ton of fun learning all of these new tricks, but at the same time I often find myself ripping my hair out (proverbially speaking, of course).

It has even begun to haunt my dreams! Seriously, for the last two nights as I've tried to drift off to sleep, my mind turns to trying to solve the next step in getting this new site functional. It even wakes me up in the middle of the night. None of what's going through my head makes much sense, because I'm barely awake, but my subconscious seems to think it's important, because if I start to fall asleep I'll get one of my weird muscle tics and wake up again. I know these tics are directly related to what I'm thinking about, because if I am able to consciously shift my mind onto something else, they stop. Unfortunately that's sometimes easier said than done. Last night I had an especially difficult time doing so, and slept horribly as a result.

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Wed 05/05/2010 1:23 PM

a season of loss and new beginnings

Spring is supposed to be a season of birth, renewal, and new beginnings. But to me, it often seems more like a season of loss. It seems that people I care about are taken from this world, or have someone taken from them, more often in spring than any other season. There have been a few springs in my life where I have felt these losses piling up, each one coming before I've had enough time to process the last, and I don't remember having that feeling at any other time of year.

The reason I am bringing this up is because this is turning into one of those springs. Just in the past two weeks, a childhood friend from MDA summer camp passed away, and then a close friend lost his sister to cancer. And this morning, my sister-in-law and her family had to put their beloved dog Jake to sleep.

I guess you could say that these are new beginnings, that those lost to us are actually being freed from their suffering and beginning a better life in a better place, but that isn't much consolation to those of us left to continue this life without them. As much as I love spring for the transformation it brings to the world, the transition from cold, dead winter into summer, my favorite season... all of this loss really makes it bittersweet.

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Fri 04/30/2010 1:37 PM

everybody's working for the weekend

TGIF. That universally recognized acronym chanted by full time workers everywhere to signal that the weekend starts in just a few hours. To us, the 40-hour slaves, the weekend is what the entire week is all about. We work for five days just to earn enough money to finance those two days at the end when we get to actually live our lives. That, and to keep a roof over our heads despite barely spending any time there, and to eat to fuel our bodies for more work. Even though you're only paid for eight hours, really the entire work day is consumed by work. You probably get a half hour to an hour lunch break, somewhere in the middle of the day, that is off the clock but still isn't really yours. All you have time for is to eat, to fill your body with energy that is just going to be burned up back at work. And when you go home, you cook, eat, clean, probably do some laundry so you'll have something clean to wear to work the next day, and then you pass out from exhaustion and spend the next eight to ten hours sleeping... so you can function at work the next day. So the weekend is the only time that is truly yours, the only reward you get for those five days of work.

It doesn't seem right, does it? I mean, I don't believe our purpose here in this world is to work. I believe it's to live, to spend what little time we have here doing what we enjoy and what truly makes us happy. Whatever that is - spending time with loved ones, traveling, extreme sports, relaxing by the pool with a frozen margarita in your hand - is different for everyone. But I don't think it's right that we have to spend five days out of the week working for someone else, just so we can afford those two days of doing what we want to do. Oh, sure, there are a few people who are lucky enough to actually be able to earn a living doing what they truly enjoy. But they are the exception, not the rule.

I think it should be the other way around, don't you? Imagine being able to work two days a week, and earn enough to support yourself and whatever lifestyle you want for the other five days. Hell, I would even be okay with a twelve-hour work day if it was only two days a week. I know, it would never work in our current economic system. And I'm not any kind of expert on economics, so I couldn't even begin to envision what it would take to make something like that work. So, I guess I'll just keep dreaming... and keep "working for the weekend".

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